New Moondog! It is crappy!

U Mich's college radio station specializes in three things:

1) Uncomfortable pauses filled with ums and yeahs.
2) Mispronouncing things
3) Playing the bad (therefore obscure, therefore *cooler*) songs of usually awesome artists...except this one guy on Saturdays who plays really good, I mean REALLY good Trance. Now, Alexis and I have been trying to pin down really good Trance since way back when it was cool when we were kiddos, so when this guy played something that we both fucking loved, I actually called in to find out what it was:

Guy: "Um, hello?"
Me: "Hey, can you tell me what that song was, before that last one. It was awesome, I loved it, I must get it."
Guy: "Uh, yeah, well, that's my iPod on shuffle. I can't really tell you what it was. Yeah."
Me: "Dude, your iPod rocks. I want my iPod to be like your iPod."
Guy: "Yeah. Um, Sorry."

So, tonight, the obscurity contest was in full swing, and I heard what I swore was Moondog's voice. Except atonal, poorly rhythmed and bizarre...I wasn't sure until after the first chorus when I heard the phrase: "What about goat rights? What about stoat rights?" It was then that I knew. Who invokes stoats in song but the 'dog? I mean, if I wrote songs, they would all be about Stoat. Because, well, I love Stoat.

The song is actually called "Enough about Human Rights," and then goes through a series of paired questions with rhyming animals, including goat and stoat and pike and shrike (shrike!). It is from an album called "H'Art Songs." It basically sucks. It's cool, though, I mean, they guy was a genius like, 97% of the time. I'd like to see your genius percentage, ya' smarty-pants.

Now, we here at Bean Gables are totally committed to Stoat rights. We do, after all, have the lead quacker of the Stoat's Rights movement in our bed most nights. What's she doing? Quacking. All the time with the quacking.

In fact, Stoat has become so committed to the Stoat's Rights movement that she's considering changing her name from Stoat to Stoat X (the x stands for x-tra quacky). We don't give it much credence, though, she's changed her name a lot these days as her self-identity shifts. In the past she has called herself:

Quetzestoatl - during her obsession with blood sacrifice...and calendars
Der Strudle - during her German Existentialism phase
Stoatle McGroatle - who stood against the tyranny of British Rule (also briefly dated Sinead O'Connor...the Pope thing was Stoat's idea.)
Sad-Sad Magraw - from her early days in the American West

A Stoat is a varied and wondrous thing!
It has rights!