Thursday, March 10, 2005

Just passing through

I'm still feeling the affects of both jet-lag and sea/land legs. The latter of which is manifesting through a sort of listing to one side.

I feel much, much heavier on my right, and find myself leaning way over against a wall or an arm rest - viewing the world (screen) from a 25 degree angle. It's as if all of my beans have concentrated on the right, and my left is full of fluff and miracles. I will need some sort of adaptive anti-gravitational device that I plan to build from ace bandages and plastic sheeting.

The jet-lag is also kicking my butt. I think I'm getting older, and am not as spry as I once was. I am proposing, then, different flight patterns for those of us over thirty...we should only travel WEST. West is the good direction - you get to sleep in upon arrival.

Therefore, a round-trip ticket from Detroit to Sacramento would now go like this:

Detroit to Sacramento (for to eat the oranges)
Sleep in.

And Back...
Sacramento to Tokyo (for some sushi and a quick round with a soaking tub)
Sleep way in.

Tokyo to London (to stock up on tea)
Don't sleep - it's London.

London to New York (to get a knish)

New York to Detroit
Arrive fresh as a thirty-year-old daisy.

Easy, right?

The world is round for a reason.