Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Little Miss Cranky Pants is temporarily assuaged.

I've had IBS for a couple of years now. IBS is *irritable bowel syndrome*, and is not to be confuddled with its more damaging cousin IBD (inflammatory bowel disease - like Crohn's). According to the popular media, like, tons of people have this syndrome, or various other uncomfortable digestive situations. It's probably connected in some way to our years of rich overeating or some such. IBS is either getting more prevalent, or more acceptable in polite conversation; I mean, who used to feel comfortable talking about erectile dysfunction? Now it's all my e-mail wants to discuss.

In me, IBS is cyclical, like it stays for a couple weeks to a month, and disappears for a couple weeks to a month. When it's at its worst, I end up being incapacitated for an hour or so at a time, several times a day. I can honestly say, it's the worst pain I've ever felt - like my gut is being wrung out and shaken. It will wake me up a few times a night, and I'll spend hours in the dark waiting for the pain to subside.

There're drugs - painkillers, anti-spasmodics...but I can't help feeling that this is something that I should be able to control, though I've found no pattern that might help me understand why it happens. So, last night, I went to an energy healing clinic.

There are various alternative medicine practices that I've considered...this was just my first stop.

It is v. interesting.

First, they check your Chakras with a small pendulum. Evidently, it is supposed to swing in a graceful, clockwise circle, and they look for wobbling or for incorrect movement. Then they do their thing - sometimes touching, sometimes touching the body they say extends past your body. At the end of a half-hour, when I was telling Alexis about it, the only way I could describe it was "insectoid".

"That makes me uncomfortable," she said.

What I meant, is that I felt all fluid and connected I was filled with goo that flowed through my body in a single cavity. Like I said, v. interesting. Endolymph (I didn't know it had a name, I thought it was called insect goo...)

I don't know, I don't know...all I can tell you is that I slept throught the night for the first time in weeks.