Tuesday, January 20, 2009

My New Year's Resolution:

Eat more.

Eat more and more regularly.


So far, it's been going well. I used to only rarely eat breakfast, and often I'd be desperately searching for some horrid food starting around 2:30 in the afternoon. I'm experimenting now with giant breakfasts (Entire bagels with lox! Two slices of toast with my egg! TWO!), and actual lunches. I've even started to consider the merits of an afternoon snack.


When I asked the Good Doctor what I should resolve to do in 2009, she said:
"You should stop drinking pee."
Me: "I do not."
Dr (rolling her eyes): "Oh, yeah. If there's one thing you never do, it's drink pee."
Me: "Come on."
Dr (patting my shoulder): "Well, you do drink a lot less than you used to. But this year, maybe you should quit entirely."
Me:"You are an ass."
Dr: "You say that every time I ask you to stop, but it doesn't make your problem go away."

Yeah, welcome to my kitchen...it's like this every goddamn day.